The 10 Best Gentle Parenting Books
I’ve written a lot of articles on the subject of positive parenting, as well as home education, with tips and advice on how you can create a more peaceful and happy dynamic within your family.
Often people ask for book recommendations on certain subjects so I thought it would be helpful to create a guide on the best gentle parenting books out there, so you can prioritize which are most suited to your family’s current needs (although I’d recommend ALL of them in time!)
So here we are my favorite gentle parenting books that will transform your (and your child’s) life. If you enjoy these recommendations please share this article using the social media buttons above or the Pin pictures below.
How to Become a Gentle Parent: Books to Help You
There are different types of parenting methods. Our decision to welcome the gentle parenting approach is something we’re very happy to have done.
If you find yourself constantly criticizing your kids and yelling at them, and you want to become a better role model and make your child feel loved and accepted by you properly, then these books will aid you in practicing gentle parenting!
Two Thousand Kisses a Day by L. R. Knost
The first award-winning author L. R. Knost’s gentle parenting series, Two Thousand Kisses a Day is a brilliant read for parents wondering why gentle parenting makes a difference.
Knost creates a strong case for moving towards empathetic, respectful behavior towards children and practical ways in which parents can do this. She also outlines how gentle parenting applies to each of the developmental stages and why it will have an incredible effect on both how your child develops, and the parent-child relationship.
Buy it now:
Unconditional Parenting by Alfie Kohn
A fantastic book for parents who question the conventional, control-based approach to children, Unconditional Parenting goes through extensive research about rewards and punishments and lays out ways that we can move from doing things ‘to’ kids, to working in harmonious partnership.
Buy it now:
The 5 Love Languages of Children: The Secret to Loving Effectively by Gary Chapman
This is one of my absolute favorites, so much so that I did videos on how to identify your child’s love language and 25 ways to connect with your child using love languages. The concept of Love Languages is that each of us feels loved through different events; whether that’s physical touch, verbally, by receiving gifts, and so on. The 5 Love Languages of Children explains the different ways that you can show your children love effectively using their personal preferences.
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The Gentle Parent: Positive, Practical, Effective Discipline by L. R. Knost
Perfect for parents, teachers, and caregivers, The Gentle Parent by L. R. Knost helps readers understand how to communicate effectively with children and teenagers to guide without imposing control.
This book shows how to choose and maintain boundaries, and how to use empathetic and creative resolutions to create win-win situations for both adults and children.
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The Gentle Parenting Book: How to raise calmer, happier children by Sarah Ockwell-Smith
If you’ve been raised in a very conventional, punishment-and-rewards-based home, The Gentle Parenting Book by Sarah Ockwell is a good introduction to parenting in more of a partnership-focused way.
Addressing many issues that parents find stressful such as weaning, potty training, sibling rivalry, and tantrums, the Gentle Parenting book is a first step in creating a more peaceful relationship with your child.
Once you’ve read this book I would highly recommend moving on to Unconditional Parenting by Alfie Kohn, which I believe develops more on the principles introduced by the author.
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The Gardener and The Carpenter by Alison Gopnik
Any book by Alison Gopnik is a real treat- insightful, philosophical, and scientific, she shows how the multi-billion-dollar ‘parenting industry’ has messed up the idea of parenting and in doing so, damaged the relationships between children and parents. Gopnik talks about the different ways that we can approach our role as parents- either as ‘gardeners’ or ‘carpenters’, and how we can create an environment that teaches children where to learn and develop best.
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Whispers Through Time: Communication through the ages and stages by L. R. Knost
We all communicate differently, and even with the best intentions sometimes our communication styles can miss each other. Whispers Through Time helps parents (and caregivers) to see normal childhood behaviors in a new light and suggests ways to practically communicate with your children, developing and changing from infancy right through to their teen years.
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The Philosophical Baby by Alison Gopnik
Whether you have had one baby or five (or are expecting your first!), this book opens the reader’s eyes to a side of babies that is rarely touched on.
Gopnik unravels how the first precious years of life lay down the foundations for the rest of their lives, and how every behavior and experience is linked to their development. An essential read for parents who want to be mindful of their baby’s emotions and inner life.
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The Myth of the Spoiled Child by Alfie Kohn
One to read if you often find yourself challenged on your parenting style by friends or family who claim you will ‘spoil’ your child by gentle parenting.
Kohn unravels the myths behind ‘spoiled’ children, including how bad behavior issues develop and the needs behind them (and it’s not too much kindness!) In the media today there is always one kind of involved parent being attacked – ‘coddling’, ‘helicopter’, and more. Kohn debunks the hysteria behind these moral panics and challenges a culture that believes we should be less kind to kids.
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Punished by Rewards by Alfie Kohn
A really interesting, eye-opening read into why rewarding our children may be doing just as much damage as punishments.
Looking into the psychology of what happens when we offer children rewards to do things, Kohn explores relationship-based alternatives that encourage the intrinsic motivation to teach your child to do the right thing, rather than simply complying for a treat.
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Reading about the different ways that leading psychologists, researchers, and educators have come to prioritize a new, gentler way of communicating with children is highly beneficial for parents, caregivers, and teachers.
Whether you’ve been a parent for days or years these positive and gentle parenting books are excellent resources in educating and reminding ourselves about the primary importance of a connected parent-child relationship.
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