Welcome- and firstly, a *massive* virtual hug to all of you parents who have chosen to read this post. Given the title I would imagine that you are in a painful, distressing situation where your child is unhappy or not thriving at school, and you may be thinking of homeschooling them.
Because most children in the UK attend school, we are set up to think that school as the default is the healthiest and most natural educational path for children. If our child doesn’t fit into school, we can feel like we have somehow failed them- like we could or should have done more to help them, or that we have let them down by not being able to make it work.
Let me tell you now, nothing could be further from the truth.

If you are reading this article I expect you have had sleepless nights over what to do about your child’s education, about their happiness and even deep concerns over their mental health. You may have had meetings or letter correspondence with the school, with teachers and headteachers and mental health support professionals.
You may have gone back and forth in your head about what might happen if you deregister and homeschool your child- leaving school and starting home education can feel like leaving relative safety and jumping into an abyss. You’re not sure how your child will cope, or what resources are available, or how they might do exams, or what their future will look like.
You may have concerns about how you’ll make it work with your own work arrangements, and childcare, or about how you’ll get your child to do work when they seem so disengaged.

You may not believe me, but I want to tell you that the path you are looking down is not just a safety net, but an actually wonderful, wonderful secret. Homeschooling is a path that is hidden from most, because it doesn’t suit the government or local authorities to empower parents to educate their own children. But- in a way- this is the magic of it.
In a minute I will tell you briefly what our homeschooling lifestyle looks like- please bare in mind that there are countless ways of home educating in the UK, it is entirely up to you how you do it and there are no compulsory hours, topics or exams. If you don’t want to, your child does not have to do anything that remotely looks like school- no textbooks, no written work, nothing that they consider boring or pointless.
This often comes as a relief to parents whose children really resist this school style kind of learning and I hope it is encouraging to know that it is a perfectly reasonable and normal response in many children. They may just not suit sitting down or textbook-type work but could be awesome in a woodworking workshop, or in the garden, or in the kitchen, or working with animals or computers or cars or children.

If you think of how many different roles and jobs we have in the adult world, this makes total sense.
I have three children and none of them have ever been to nursery, daycare or school. I was very lucky to have found out about home education before my eldest daughter was born, and I’d already decided to homeschool when she was a newborn. I have not regretted it for a moment; in fact I wrote a post about 40 advantages of homeschooling, and I could easily add more.
Our UK Homeschool Routine (relaxed and flexible)
Our approach is relaxed and personal to each child, so I’ll give you a rough monthly timetable (I’ve changed the days around for privacy but all of this is accurate and average for a standard month).
Monday– Twice a month they have a qualified teacher led homeschool group that runs for 4 hours, divided into 1 hour each of art, English, Maths and project work. Last term the project was based on the ocean, this term it’s Harry Potter.
All the activities in the group are related to the theme so for example this term they might design their own House Crest in art, write a spell in English, do maths puzzles related to potions and study herbal medicine ‘old magic’ as part of the project hour- just for example.
On the weeks they don’t have group we go trampolining at a local centre with around 20 other home educated children- it’s practically empty in the day so the kids have free range of the trampolines!
In the evening my middle child goes to Beavers and I take the youngest and eldest to the library or food shopping while we wait for her.

Tuesday– Day at home (cleaning our 8 pets, tidying up after the weekend, cooking, read-alouds, painting, Reading Eggs, keyboard practise, watching those godforsaken Youtube videos about people painting squishes, playing board games, maybe a trip to Aldi). In the evening we go swimming.
Once a month the kids go to a LEGO engineering and Science workshop for 3 and a half hours.
Wednesday– Twice a month I take the eldest two girls to a Montessori style STEM homeschool group that runs for four and a half hours. There are loads of activities set out such as Magnatiles, puzzles, arts and crafts as well as structured activities led by a qualified teacher.
These activities include making bird feeders or slime or candle holders. At all times the children have access to an outdoor play area, a design studio with Lego and K’Nex, and an indoor playroom where they look after fish and tadpoles in the spring.
The children make their own snacks such as pastry pizza rockets, or they might have a themed afternoon tea with cakes and sandwiches, and chocolate milk poured from a teapot, and they practise their ‘posh’ manners. There are three adults, two of whom are qualified teachers, and around 12 children.
On the days we don’t have group, we’ll arrange a playdate.

Thursday – The girls go out with my Mum and do something like rollerskating in a local park, or baking, or arts and crafts, or the cinema. This is my ‘work day’ so I work from home. In the evening my eldest goes to Cubs group.
Wednesday– We often meet another homeschooling family at a local farm and spend the whole day there. The children go in the soft play, chat to the staff about animal care and spend a lot of time on the adventure playground. We’ll also do homework from the homeschool group.
Friday- Twice a month I take the eldest two girls to a Montessori style STEM homeschool group that runs for four and a half hours. There are loads of activities set out such as Magnatiles, puzzles, arts and crafts as well as structured activities led by a qualified teacher.
These activities include making bird feeders or slime or candle holders. At all times the children have access to an outdoor play area, a design studio with Lego and K’Nex, and an indoor playroom where they look after fish and tadpoles in the spring.
The children make their own snacks such as pastry pizza rockets, or they might have a themed afternoon tea with cakes and sandwiches, and chocolate milk poured from a teapot, and they practise their ‘posh’ manners. There are three adults, two of whom are qualified teachers, and around 12 children.
Saturday– The usual family stuff- IKEA, trips to the dump, the usual! We often go for a sunset walk on a nearby common and every Saturday we have family movie night with pizza.

Sunday– Sometimes we go to church but we are very chilled about it and if some of the kids don’t want to go then one of us stays at home with them and the other takes whoever wants to go. Then we mooch around, go to the park, etc.
Around each of the set activities are more of the type that I stated for Tuesday- arts and crafts, read-alouds (I’ll read to them for around an hour, they love it; favourites are anything by Enid Blyton or Roald Dahl, and Harry Potter), cooking, dancing, keyboard practice, gardening, looking after/ playing with pets, tidying, shopping, etc!
The girls also love watching Coyote Peterson on Youtube and playing on Minecraft, as well as mini-movie nights where I’ll bundle them up with popcorn and a film.
We also travel a lot (we did a family gap year backpacking around Asia when they were 6, 5 and 2) and we love visiting family who live in other parts of the UK.

I don’t know if this is the kind of routine you’d imagined for a homeschooling family. If any of it makes you tense or wonder how you’d replicate any of it, please bear in mind that this is just our family- we know people who do more sit-down book learning and those who do less; there are as many ways to homeschool as there are homeschooling children!
If Your Child Hates School, They Are Showing Normal Responses
Some children love school. Some like it, and some tolerate it. For some children it is torture. It may be overwhelming for the senses, or they may find the competitive social or academic aspects intolerable.
These are appropriate, if distressing responses to the school environment that is not set up to suit all children. There is nothing ‘wrong’ with your child if they can’t manage school. It is the environment that is not suited to them, and if they are expressing that they don’t want to be there, they are doing their job in seeking a safer and happier environment for themselves. This is a good thing.
I am not saying that children hating school is good, far from it. What I am saying is that it is impossible that a standardised institution will suit everyone, and that it is good that those children for whom it doesn’t work, communicate that their needs are not being met.
You have not failed your child if they hate school, or can’t cope with it. The very fact you are reading this post indicates that you are a committed and loving parent, which is absolutely the most important thing for a child to have. Homeschooling is not a failure, even if it was not your first choice and even if you feel pushed into it.
It is a wonderful, alternative path for children, and one to be embraced and celebrated. It may be daunting, but there are many homeschooling support groups and so many people home educate that it would be almost impossible to live somewhere in the UK without an accessible home educating community.
Now for some homeschool mythbusting. You do not need to be remotely academic in order to home educate your child, for the very good reasons that I outline in this post “What qualifications do you need to homeschool?”
You can still work and home educate, you can home educate if you claim benefits and the only things you really need to homeschool are free. Children do not have to take exams, and if you are worried you have missed or forgotten something during the process of considering home education, there is this post on things to consider before home educating.
Homeschool socialisation is a non-issue because of the social opportunities available to homeschoolers
I have written a post on over 100 homeschooling resources and the online support groups are a hub of info and advice. Homeschooling parents are very supportive of each other and there are always more experienced home educators willing to help you out, especially with local authority visits and checks while homeschooling queries.
In short, I believe that the vast majority of parents who are willing, can home educate. And if your child isn’t thriving at school, it is worth asking the question- what have you got to lose? Find out how to start UK homeschooling now.
Jenny says
Hi
Could you let me know where you found things like the Montessori style STEM homeschool group you go to? I’ve looked online and joined many home school facebook groups, but there don’t seem to be too many ‘physical’ groups to go to. also love the sound of the lego group. we’re in surrey so I would’ve thought there would be quite a few… thank you!